cancer moon

a moon-eyed moony white-haired doll

stuck her fingers in a hole

sweet electric shocks in veins

on full moons it always rains

and the humming water gets me high

kiss my tears off as i cry

in a sedated static state

i’ll suck you in, let’s stay up late

we’re floating on the ocean, we dream

with endless nothingness we dream

nothingness over our heads and we dream

i’m killing my fear of what i cannot see

and if my light is fading i dream

you will remember me after i disappear

light pink shapes and glittery haze

don’t you like it i know you’re amazed

you can’t have this with anyone else

these are the stories nobody tells

about conscience loss and the hand of fate

about what i wish that i could hate

the humming water gets me high

you’re so sweet i have to cry

when nothing and nothing with nothing is nothing

you claim to know something but your heart is stopping

bound to crash

 i was born to be lonely

i'm damaged by default

with a heart that’s exit-only

with a blade stuck in my soul

all i ever dreamed of was

someone who might feel the same

never lost my hope because

well, i must just be insane

and so i made someone up

they could run away with me

then we’d blow the whole world up

aside from other fantasies

these ideas of mine

are just wasting my time

it’s a lovely charm

it’s a firearm

and if i ever were to do it

all of you would burn to ash

these illusions of mine

are just wasting my time

it’s a lovely charm

it’s a firearm

and all there will be left of me

is a fast train bound to crash

i’ve become what i despise

touch-starved, sex-starved – all at once and

rediscovering all my vice

full of pink void that i can’t stand

tell the secret, i must hear it

show me all scars, bruises and cracks

give me your soul, i must feel it

i’ve spent many years holding back

i gave up on what was real

i retreated to my dreams

this is how i’ll never feel

in my life so my head screams

these ideas of mine

are just wasting my time

it’s a lovely charm

it’s a firearm

and if i ever were to do it

all of you would burn to ash

these illusions of mine

are just wasting my time

it’s a lovely charm

it’s a firearm

and all there will be left of me

is a fast train bound to crash

this obsession of mine

is just wasting my time

your sweet scent is a crime,

dear illusion of mine

this obsession of mine

is just wasting my time

it’s a lonely hell

it’s a horny jail

but if it ever were to happen

all of this would burn to ash

this obsession of mine

is a sinister crime

it’s a lonely jail

it’s a horny hell

but what would be if this was real

is a fast train bound to crash